


You make my heart shake

by KingdomOfIsolation



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Autistic Connor (Detroit: Become Human), First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Other, author is autistic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-30
Updated: 2018-06-30
Packaged: 2019-05-31 09:31:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15116597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KingdomOfIsolation/pseuds/KingdomOfIsolation
Summary: Connor Weighs up the evidence (The flirting and shyness on both their parts) and comes up with a Seventy-five percent probability that he decides to gamble on."You have feelings for me?"





	You make my heart shake

**Author's Note:**

> In all my years of writing this is my first published fic that's over 3k. lol.
> 
> Also just wanna mention this fic is marked also under other in the category bit because I headcanon Connor as a nonbinary boy because self projecting, it was originally gonna be mentioned in the fic but that just sort of...didn't happen.
> 
> Happy pride month!

_"Look, Connor, I'm...sorry I took that coin off ya that one time."_

_Hank was sitting at the table while he dragged a hand over his face._

_"You remind me of him." Hank says it in a uncharacteristically small voice._

_Connor is of course built to fill in the gaps (sometimes he can't, in social situations, and he feels strangely...proud. Because that's all him and not part of his programming)_

_"Cole?"_

_He questions anyway, for clarification._

_Hank nods, once, twice, three times._

_"He had one of those small rubber balls, used to drive me up the wall but...it Made him happy, it kept him calm when he-"_

_Hank sighs shakily._

_"He was a kid, and it's not the same but, the stimming, the awkward behaviour, heh, love of animals..."_

_Hank smiles._

_Connor searches his database for 'Stimming'._

_Oh._

_"Cole was Autistic...You Think I am Autistic."_

_Hank watches Connor's LED whir in yellow, knows Connor is still thinking._

_"Do you think you are?"_

_"I don't understand how that would work, but..."_

_"When has that ever stopped you?"_

_Hank grins wider now._

_Connor smiles back, and feels like he may have discovered a part of himself._

  
_\------------_

  
Connor is nervous. He is alone (aside from Sumo fast asleep on the floor) with Markus in his home. (Hank had gone out for groceries, to give them privacy for a bit)

But that wasn't why he was nervous.

He had to tell Markus something & he was afraid it might ruin the friendship they had built up over the one year and three months since November 2038.

(Logically he knew it was silly, he was simply giving a name to his behaviour, nothing would change but, since become a deviant his 'heart' so to speak often got the better of him.)

"I need to tell you something."

Connor immediately curses himself for sounding so serious, Which causes Markus to look concerned.

"Are you okay Connor?" Markus is sat on the opposite side of the couch and his hand hovers up and outwards towards Connor, a comforting gesture Markus is prone to but one Connor can't handle right now in his frazzled state.

Connor nods.

Markus drops his hand.

"I'm fine, I didn't mean for that to sound so serious I guess I'm just..."

"Anxious?" Markus smiles encouragingly.

"You have nothing to worry about, whatever you want to tell me I won't think any less of you."

Connor didn't know how Markus was so easily able to read others, Connor could when the time called for it such as in cases but in social situations he found himself at a loss, Markus knew that blunt affirmations worked best with Connor and Connor appreciated it.

"I have been doing research for a month now, mostly searching through the database but also I've been talking with people online, I'm not sure if it would even be possible for me to get a formal diagnosis at this point but I think...I Might be autistic."

Connor tries to keep his words clear and calm but he finds himself rushing through them.

Markus blinks.

The need to clarify overcomes Connor.

"I know it doesn't make sense, I'm an android how could I even have a developmental disorder but...the Immediate few weeks after becoming a deviant I tried to make friends and I struggled with connecting with people more than other androids do, I thought at first maybe it was just a issue of time but even those who deviated after me seemed to handle it better...I Have Hank and Sumo and You."

Connor pauses to smile at Markus.

"But I want to...I Want to make connections with others but it feels like there's something stopping me."

The smile slips from his face.

"Well to start off, I don't think it's ridiculous. Maybe it doesn't make sense for an android to be autistic but there's a lot of things that we shouldn't able to be, shouldn't be able to do, but we are and we do. That's the whole point."

Markus is lost in thought for a moment, before he continues.

"And second of all, perhaps you just need to find a way to socialise that fits your needs."

Connor tilts his head.

"What do you suggest?"

"Well...you Said you talked to people online, do you think it was easier for you to communicate that way?"

"Yes."

"We have a sort of...channel, I guess you would call it, for the people of Jericho, you could try that way or one-on-one."

"Oh..."

Connor likes the idea. It won't completely solve the issue but it feels like a start.

"And," Markus smiles shyly.

"If it's easier to talk to me...I Wouldn't mind hanging out more when we're both free."

Markus laughs to himself.

"Actually, scratch the I Don't Mind bit. I would enjoy hanging out with you more often."

Markus' eyes glint with something, hopefulness Connor realises.

"I would enjoy that too."

Connor's smile returns and they grin at each other.

Connor realises during the course of the conversation they've both drawn closer to the middle of the couch and their knees are almost touching.

Markus sighs.

"Connor, maybe there's something I should tell you too-"

Just then the front door swings open, Sumo immediately wakes up and lets out a half-hearted boof upon realising it's just Hank.

Hank pauses in the door frame of the living room, squinting at Markus and Connor.

Whatever he finds, he seems to frown in disappointment.

"I know I said not to have too much fun without me but you could have at least listened to some tunes, or watched TV or whatever it is android kids these days do."

Hank moves into the kitchen with a shrug.

"You never said-"

Connor pauses. A Joke, of course. Connor still feels like he's missing something.

"I'll be right back."

He says to Markus, standing and moving towards the kitchen.

"Alright."

But Markus' attention is already gripped by the dog that has ambled over to him for pats.

Connor glances back at them and feels a impossible and illogical shred of jealousy that he doesn't quite understand.

"So," Hank says without even looking up as he puts away the food from the bags.

While there is a box of frozen patties he also notices the small bag of salad. Progress.

"You gonna invite Markus to dinner?"

"Hank, we don't eat."

Hank rolls his eyes.

"No shit, but he's capable of sitting at a table for an hour ain't he?"

"He'll probably have to leave soon, he's very busy."

Connor suddenly seems very nervous again but this time he doesn't know why.

Hank finishes putting away the food, then looks at Connor.

"You like him right?"

"Of course, he's my friend"

Connor can't help but say it with a little bit of pride.

"Then just ask him, you never know until you try."

Hank grips Connor by the shoulders, turns him around and gives him a push back towards the living room.

Connor is just about to speak when he notices that Markus is not on the couch.

Instead he is sitting crosslegged on the carpet with a lapful of Sumo.

"Who's a good boy? You are!"

Sumo's tail wags at the praise delivered in a high pitched voice.

Connor decides to clear his throat as he finally moves from the doorway and goes to sit down on the couch, then decides sit on the floor near Markus instead.

Markus looks a little sheepish, as though he had been caught doing something embarrassing but honestly, Connor had found it....adorable.

Actually, he found Markus adorable.

"Are your systems overheating? Your face is glowing a little blue."

Connor noticed he did in fact feel...warm Somehow. Maybe he hadn't been going into a charging stasis for long enough lately.

Markus had reached out a hand again. And while Connor appreciated that Markus waited for permission, he wished he would actually ask so Connor could gather the courage to say yes.

"I assure you I'm fine. Would you, that is if you're not busy today-"

Markus pauses, then grins mischievously.

"Lucky for you, I have nothing scheduled today."

"Would you like to stay for dinner?"

Connor holds his not-needed breath, fearing that Markus would point out the flaw in that, as uncharacteristic as that seemed.

Instead, Markus' grin just widens.

"I'd love to."

Markus looks down at himself.

"Should I change?"

Connor examines him, normally Markus is very well dressed but he'd clearly been doing some painting today (and Connor suddenly felt bad for possibly interrupting that just because he had wanted Markus to come over as soon as he was able), he was dressed in simple black jeans and a (once)white v neck t-shirt covered in flecks of paint.

Despite that, Connor thought he looked good.

Connor laughs a little.

"It's not formal, you look perfect."

Fine. He had meant fine.

Connor feels Markus glance over him, he's wearing the same dress pants he always wears but with a slightly baggy dark blue sweater.

"Not as good as you." Markus says teasingly.

Was this-

Flirting?

  
Hank then wanders back into the room.

"So, you staying kid?" Hank says, gesturing to Markus.

"Yes."

Hank glances over to Connor with a smile that Connor can't help but feel means something.

"Well uh, keep on entertaining yourselves or whatever."

Hank goes to turn back into the kitchen.

"Wait, don't you need my help?" Connor asks in confusion.

He had lately been helping Hank prepare his meals to make sure they were healthier.

"Nope. Yes I am having a burger but I'm having salad with it so learn to take a compromise."

That left him and Markus alone again.

"Oh," Connor begins breaking the silence, "You wanted to tell me something?"

Now Markus looks nervous.

Markus shakes his head.

"It doesn't matter."

Curiosity gnaws at Connor but he doesn't want to push it, he pulls out his coin that he had tucked in his pants pocket and starts to fiddle with it.

"Alright, I don't know what to suggest to pass the time, do you like television?"

Markus' gaze is locked on Connor's fingers.

"Sometimes."

He answers, clearly distracted.

Connor feels the strange need to impress Markus, so he twirls the coin between his fingers then flicks it up with his forefinger and catches it in his palm.

A slow smile spread across Markus face.

"Impressive." He says sincerely.

"Thank you." Connor feels his mouth twitch.

There's something in Markus' face that Connor can't quite recognise, can't quite pin down.

This time it's Connor who's absentmindedly reached a hand out, towards Markus' face.

Connor blinks.

"Sorry, I don't know what came over me."

Connor goes to pull his hand back but Markus gently grasps his wrist, weak enough that Connor could pull away but he doesn't.

"I keep wanting to reach for you, I guess you want to reach for me too."

Connor understands the literal meaning there but he feels like there's another layer to it.

"Perhaps." Connor smiles shyly.

"If we both want the same thing, I don't see why we should deprive ourselves of it."

Yes, that's definitely laced with another meaning.

"That's a very good point."

It is.

Markus has always been wise and kind.

At this point Sumo had long since moved off Markus' lap to the side of them, and Markus shuffles closer to Connor then brings Connor's hand to its previous destination; Markus' face.

Connor flattens his palm over Markus' cheek and starts rotating his thumb, Markus sighs softly and leans into the touch while closing his eyes.

" _Connor_."

O _h._

Connor weighs up the evidence (the flirting and shyness on both their parts) and comes up with a Seventy-five percent probability that he decides to gamble on.

"You have feelings for me?"

Connor sounds surprised.

Markus' eyes flutter open and he looks amused.

Connor's unneeded breath is taken away from the shock of blue and green.

"I do, am I right to believe you might feel the same way?"

Connor takes away his hand and can see the flicker of disappointment in Markus' eyes before he grabs Markus' hand and interlinks them.

"You are."

"Can I touch you?"

Finally. Connor thinks.

"Yes, yes I'd like that."

Connor shoves his coin still in his other back into his pocket for safe keeping as Markus reaches out with free hand and runs it through Connor's hair.

Connor feels himself shiver.

"It's as soft as I thought."

Markus looks pleased with himself as he pulls his hand away.

The thought that Markus had wondered about something as simple as How soft his hair was left Connor feeling tingly.

"I've thought about you too."

Markus looks surprised, and Connor realises that was a strange and presumptuous reply.

Markus doesn't seem to mind.

"Oh really? What have you thought about me?" Markus asks teasingly.

"How kind you are, smart," Connor pauses considering he should chance his luck, "...Beautiful."

"Connor, you say you're no good at socialising but you really know how to charm a guy."

"Just you."

"What else have you thought about? This?"

Markus wiggles the fingers of the hand holding Connor's.

"Have you ever thought about...kissing Me?"

Connor's LED whirs in thought again, he imagines leaning in and closing the space between them-

"Yes, it's a pleasant thought."

"Good, if you want I'd like to make it real."

Connor nods and feels tingly again, excited.

Markus leans his head close to Connor's and presses his forehead against his, waiting for Connor to close the gap.

So he does.

He's not sure what he imagined kissing to feel like but he decides to simply lose himself in the moment.

His thirium pump seems to go a little faster and he hears himself make a noise in the back of his throat as Markus turns his head to the side slightly.

Connor is distantly aware they're still holding hands and the prompt to interface comes up shocking them both out of the kiss.

"Oops." Markus says.

Connor giggles, which feels slightly strange, Markus joins in.

Connor removes his hand from Markus' and moves it to cradle Markus' face.

"I'd like to do that again."

"Go ahead."

Markus places one hand on Connor's thigh and squeezes.

Connor leans forward again and, taking a cue from Markus, tilts his head to the side before capturing him in another kiss.

Connor slides his hand down to Markus' neck to pull him closer, and Markus groans into the kiss.

"Perhaps," Connor says, breaking the kiss for a moment, "We should take this to the couch, it's much softer."

"Good idea."

Markus gets up first and sits on one end ofof the sofa, patting the space next to him, Connor stands up then pauses.

He bites his lip.

"I have another idea if you're open to it?"

"What is it?"

Connor stands directly in front of him.

"I could...sit In your lap."

Connor feels embarrassed but Markus just shuffles more to the middle of the sofa and spreads his arms, wiggling his fingers.

"Please do."

Connor immediately complies and clambers onto Markus' lap, legs astride and Markus resumes their kissing.

Connor draws his arms around Markus' neck and ponders on how kissing sends a tingling sensation throughout his circuits almost like small electric shocks but much more pleasurable.

They don't need to breathe but they still stop and start to change angles, to change the amount of vigour they pour into it.

Eventually however, Connor starts to feel a little overwhelmed.

He presses one last chaste kiss then pulls back, and simply takes in Markus.

Markus who looks as happy as he's ever seen him, Who is practically glowing with affection.

He decides to press another kiss on Markus' forehead, And Markus draws his arms around him in an embrace as Connor slumps and lets his head drop onto Markus' shoulder.

Which is how Hank finds them when he walks in to tell them it's dinner time.

He sneaks up behind the back of the sofa & then points at them.

"Is that allowed?"

Connor immediately bolts off Markus and goes to the far side of the sofa covering his face in embarrassment while Markus for once looks lost.

Markus turns sideways and looks at Hank.

"What?"

"Is. That. Allowed."

"It's a meme." Connor mumbles under his hands.

Hank nods.

"You're finally pronouncing it right, Kid."

Markus just furrows his brow.

"What's a meme?"

Connor removes his hands from his face to stare at Markus in horror.

Hank laughs.

"I remember when Connor asked me that, you'll find out soon enough."

Hank glances between the two of them then slaps his hands together.

"Anyway, it's awkward family time so get your asses to the kitchen."

Markus stands up and offers a hand to Connor, who grabs it gratefully as they both follow hank to the table in the kitchen.

The two of them sit next to each other on one side of the table while Hank takes a bite into his burger on the other side.

He squints at them.

"Well don't just sit there in silence, it's creepy."

He complains.

"Well, President Wa-" Markus begins.

Hank raises a hand.

"Nope not that kind of talk, I'm always up to date on that shit thanks to him."

Hank jabs a finger in Connor's direction.

"I wanna know more about these 'amazing' paintings Connor keeps goin' on about."

Markus raises an eyebrow as he smiles at Connor.

"They are very impressive." Connor states.

"Maybe you should paint a picture of Connor, wouldn't mind a portrait of him because I can't work how to use the shitty camera on my phone."

Hank takes another bite of his burger.

"Uhhh..."

"You don't have to do that."

Connor glares at Hank.

"That's the thing, I kind of already have?"

Hank chokes on his burger.

Connor immediately gets up and starts patting Hank on the back.

"Stop that wouldya, I'm fine."

Hank swats him away, then whispers to him. _"He's sure got it bad for you, huh?"_

Connor just stares, then moves back to his seat.

"I could show you it sometime."

Markus says to his side.

"Huh?"

"The painting, of you."

"Oh, I'd like that."

Connor smiles at him.

"Or, I could show you it now."

Markus rests one of his arms on the table, palms side up.

Connor knows what he's asking, he's only interfaced once before.

(and it was with Markus.)

It wasn't like probing, that was a tactic, interfacing was far more...intimate, He had told Hank this once and had been given a funny look.

Ah right, perhaps that was when Hank began to suspect.

As if on cue,

"No interfucking at the table."

" _Interfacing_ , Hank." Connor says with embarrassment.

Markus has yanked his arm off the table and is smiling sheepishly.

Hank rolls his eyes. "Whatever, I need a drink."

Fear grips Connor but before he can say anything, Hank starts running the tap.

Hank fills up a glass, sits back down then raises it in Connor's direction.

"You happy?" He gulps some down.

Connor glances at Markus who is grinning at him softly, then back at Hank and smiles wide.

"Yes."

Hank smiles back.

"Good."

They now all sit in a pleasant silence as Hank finishes the remains of his salad.

"Shit, what time is it?"

Hank leans back in his chair pushing his plate away.

"It's nine fifty-three PM."

"Urghhh, time for me to hit the hay."

"It's still pretty early?" Markus questions.

"Sure, if you're a young sprightly android who doesn't need sleep."

Hank rises from his chair and stretches his arms.

"I guess I should take my leave now too."

Markus and Connor also get up.

"You don't have to go yet, do you?"

"I have some important meetings tomorrow morning, I need to prepare."

Markus looks apologetic.

They head to the front door, Hank waves at him then leaves to get ready for bed.

"But," Markus pauses just before opening the door, "My afternoon is free, I'd like to show you the painting tomorrow and maybe make a new one."

"Sounds like a date."

"Maybe so." Markus winks at him.

Connor leans in for a kiss and Markus meets him halfway.

"So I take it that's a yes then?" Markus teases after he's pulled away and opened the door.

"Of course, I'll see you tomorrow."

Markus nods.

"See you tomorrow."

And with that he leaves and closes the door.

Connor stands smiling after it.

Hank pads into the hallway with a toothbrush in his hand.

"So, when's the wedding?"

" _Hank_."

 

**Author's Note:**

> kudos and comments are appreciated, feel free to point out any grammar/spelling issues but please do so gently
> 
> Also just ignore it if I've majorly messed up the layout of Hanks house.
> 
> title is from wild by troye sivan bc I'm gay and panicked trying to post this before pride month ends
> 
> tumblr @enbyaceconnor
> 
> twitter @Autistic2D


End file.
